Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Destination: Buffalo Psychiatric Center

Is a go.

I have a lead guys. Although I have my doubts. But according to Dr. Fitzpatrick, I should check the Buffalo Psychiatric Center for her. Since they would most likely send her there. It seemed that he didn't want to say anything about my mother, he actually seemed more interested in me. When I told him the news, he was genuinely worried. I could tell, he had that look in his eyes. He kept me in his office, making other people wait just to talk to me. We spoke about a lot of things, mainly my future, school, family life, Frank. Clearly he didn't want me to leave my house, and I can't blame him. This is a bit of a risk. But a risk I must take. I'm sure Dr. Fitzpatrick, and dad, will realize this in the long run.

I asked Dr. Fitzpatrick if there was anything else he could tell me about my mom. Anything at all. She said she believed she was stalked by have to wonder, what if this was him? I had hoped she gave some description on this stalker's appearance. And well...I'll just give you guys the entire conversation.

(I enter Dr. Fitzpatrick's office after HOURS of waiting)

Fitzpatrick: Ah, Steph. Good to see you. Come in. I heard about your friends funeral. Terrible...

Me: Doctor, I'm not here for that. There's more pressing matters going right now.

F: Hmm? Like what? Something wrong Stephanie?

M: Oh nothing much. I just came hoping to find out more about my mother.

F: That again? Stephanie I am as clueless as you are on the events following your mother's graduation and I've already said far too much on the subject.

M: But Doctor, this isn't about the stupid incident at the air force boot camp, this is about that stalker you told me about before. Remember? The guy that my mom claimed was stalking her? You told me when I was in the hospital?

F: Oh yes, the business man.

M: So this guy was a business man?

F: Oh yeah, a tall fellow too.

M: (It finally hits me) Slender Man!

F: What?

M: Uh...oh! Oh nothing! Just an internet fad that came to mind. I tend to...shout....these random... (I notice he was writing stuff down, bastard) Yeah.

F(muttering): Hm....Stephanie, if something's on my mind you know you can share anything with me. It's my job to be right here so you have someone to share your problems with, after all.

Are you worried about your mother by any chance?

M: Oh, yeah! Speaking of which, I wanted to ask something if you don't mind.

F: Ask me anything. Remember, I'm here for you.

M: Yeah, mother.

(I take a deep breath)

Where did they send my mom?

(there was a temporary awkward silence between us.)

F: Uh, Stephanie...I can't exactly share this information with you. It's very confidential an-

M: Please Dr. Fitzpatrick! I need to know where she is! She can be in danger! And if I stay we'll all be in danger!

F: What are you talking about, Stephanie?!

(Yeah, I sort of completely lose it)

M: Even you Doctor!

I can't fucking stay here and wait for everyone to die!

So Dr. Fitzpatrick knows about my journey away from home. He didn't approve at first. I think he still doesn't approve. I could tell he was considering sending the police after me, he even had the balls to remind me that the police would start looking for me no matter what. But it's not like I'm not aware that this might fail and everyone may get into big trouble because of me, but it's better than everyone dying. I don't need any blood on my hands at the age of seventeen. But Dr. Fitzpatrick looked like he didn't want to do it, send the cops after me I mean. I'm starting to think there may be some compassion in that doctorate heart of his. Although there was also some fear in there too. After I spilled the beans we both talked for awhile. He was nice, not amazing, but not bad either. I refuse to say I'm in debt to him though, even though he was kind enough to lend me some money that I used to buy some Raspberry Soy Cappuccino. That's some amazing stuff! You should try it Rebecca and internet! Seriously!



(In case you haven't notice they have Mardi Gra stuff up. The Mardi Gra celebration was yesterday and apparently I missed it. But supposedly it was just a bunch of people getting drunk anyways, so it probably doesn't matter. But I'm still kind of upset. I was almost tempted to pick up a necklace off the sidewalk. They STILL haven't cleaned shit up around here. Buffalo, I swear.)

Like I said before I have my doubts about the psychiatric center, but I always wanted to go inside of it. It's kind of old, so that's the reason why. It's actually a national landmark, and dates back to 1870. History and old buildings in general always fascinated me, mainly because I was this big paranormal fanatic in my early years of highs school....

Frank and I went into an abandoned house once ya know, with some pagan friend of his. We used to think it might be haunted, we saw weird faces in the windows, and heard noises in a basement. Once we saw something...something floating. The pagan friend finally told us whatever was in there...was evil...

I'm sorry, bad memories.


Anyways, part of that Freshman in me likes to think this place might be haunted. But at the same time I hope it isn't.

Speaking of hauntings. Ever realized that there are more people in the same boat as you in your area than you thought?

Saw this on the bus ride to school this morning. I had to force one of my friends to move before I could capture it on my phone...he was pretty pissed. But I think it might be relevant. Funny thing is it was by Utica Station, so I'm thinking this person took the bus to the station, and meant to go downtown. But then again...he or she probably wasn't being stalked at all, and was just some random ghetto person who thought they were being cool. But it was interesting to see on a bus ride to school, especially with all the stuff around it. You gotta love Buffalo. So much graffiti here :/ (travel from downtown, down Seneca, you'll see graffiti of the phrase "Atak" everywhere).

But I'm not Utica if that's what you guys think. Currently I'm lounging at the library typing this up.

...And I may be kicked off the computer soon.

Alright I'm off!


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